Slapstick vs Freakazoid

 Hello fellow vs debaters, I am a mega Death Battle and...well, vs debater, with tons of ideas and fights I'd love to see, this being one of the most unique. 

It's two wacky looney cartoony sons of literal glitches and all around overpowered superheroes straight out of the 90s in a 4th wall (and every other breakable thing) breaking battle for survival...in Round 1 Fights Fights!

(This is my first try on this, so forgive me for not having all related calcs and/or pictures for this, just what I researched about both the characters)

                              Slapstick

15 years ago, in an ordinary New Jersey (so already not normal) hospital, Steve Harmon was born into the world. He was a...difficult child, being a nerd, geek, and overall class clown with violent tendencies, like the day he was landed in detention by his rival Winston. Wanting revenge, Steve dressed up like a clown and followed Winston and his girlfriend to a Carnival to scare them silly. What he didn't expect was that the carnival was really a front for evil clowns ready to invade from Dimension Ecch (mistaken for Dimension X by Steve many times, but that's been taken WAY too many times, so its just Ecch, I guess), an alternate dimension with cartoonishly crazy people and places. When the unsuspecting couple got kidnapped by these Killer Klowns from Outer Space (Wink) Steve grabbed an oversized Mallet and hopped through the strange portal after them. Going down the metaphorical rabbit hole to wonderland, Steve had his Molecules stretched across thousands of Dimensions, causing spacial disturbances the likes of which cosmic tier heroes senses were shocked by, such as Spider-man, Dr. Strange, Reed Richard's, the Silver Surfer, and...Howard the Duck. Steve exited the portal as a warped visual of his costumed self, a living cartoon who would go on to master his new powers with the help of a scientist Groucho Marx and rescue the human captives, overthrow Ecchs evil overlord, and return home as a hero, but not a edgy stereotype the 90s are known for. A hero representing the Era of comedy that shaped the cartoons we love today...Slapstick.

                              Freakazoid 

Speaking of the 1990's, every channel worth their salt in cartoons was brimming with some of the most loved and appreciated superhero shows in history. Marvel and DC had hits like X-Men and Batman The Animated Series, while others to grace us included Spawn, Gargoyles, and Batman Beyond. Among all these edgy and broody shows that crowded the networks stood many parodies and joke shows that were equally popular, like Animaniacs, Tiny Toons, and Darkwing Duck. Superheroes and Comedy cartoons could seemingly never mix, always being grouped with their own kind...until Steven Spielberg struck gold yet again with a superhero the likes of which you have NEVER seen. Check out Dexter Douglas, a nerd computer ace, and a very happy one after he got the Pinnacle Chip, a marvelous device that can apparently double your Computers speed, make double tasking easier, and more. Just one problem: the company who made it screwed the pooch and gave it a little problem. If a specific code was to be typed in while the chip was active ( @[=g3,8d]\&fbb=-9)/hK%fg if any of you nerds want to actually try it), and then followed by delete, you would be zapped into cyberspace, be given superhuman strength, and the potential to do almost anything. While there is a 450 million to one chance it will happen to you, Dexter got lucky/unlucky after his cat typed in the exact same combination by walking on his keyboard, zapping Dexter to Cyberspace (the actual place, not the banger TV show), where his brain was flooded with all the knowledge of the internet, warping his body and driving him crazy (the show actually says this in the theme song) creating an alternate being from him, a cartoon powered powerhouse ready to protect the innocent...yeah no he did this to get laid. He's Freakazoid, and you're probably @#$&ed if you try to fight him.

               Slapstick's Powers and Abilities

•Superhuman Strength and Speed - Due to the incident that turned him into Slapstick, Steve had his body turned into ElectroPlasm, a nigh indestructible pool of unstable molecules that made him way stronger and faster then any human can be, just like most other Marvel Street Tiers.

•Bullsh$t Durability/Healing Factor - Remember Electroplasm? That substance is practically indestructible. Sure, he can be damged like everybody else, but his cartoon side really shines in that you Just. Can't. Kill. Him. He can shrug off solid holes blasted in him, a disintegrated head, being lit on fire, flattening from the Thing, gunshots, implement, bisection (Zipped self back up), etc. He's been stated several times to be unkillable, and its pretty true for the most part. Even when Electroplasm had been reduced to Goo by a weapon specifically set to destroy it, it has just kept going as a literal puddle to fight on.

•Shape-shifting/Cartoony Powers - Electroplasm also warps his body to be like a cartoon in multiple ways. Such abilities include Morphing and Shape-shifting his body, like bounching his eyeballs with springs or turning into a giant hammer. He can assume pretty much any form, limited only by his imagination and mass, like blowing his limbs up like balloons, growing multiple arms, or extending his tongue several hundred feet.

•Hammerspace/Magic Satchel - The one power people know cartoons have above almost anything else. Slapstick has dubbed this "infinite pockets" and he's kind of right. He can stash virtually anything in here, like weapons and tools, as well as pull things out he needs like a normal Cartoon. This is due to a sub spacial storage Dimension that Ecchs Scientist Supreme (The Groucho Marx guy) gave him in his gloves he made.

•Electricity and Energy Manipulation - Electroplasm is sort of controlled by electricity, and Slapstick can manipulate it to some degree. He has infused his weapons with his own kind of energy to enhance their power, but Electricity, any kind of contact, will massively enhance his Strength and Physical prowess, enough to take on foes capable of ragdolling him before.

•Martial Arts and Assassin Skills - After returning home, Slapstick became more of a mercenary then hero, learning the ropes after multiple years on different teams like the New Warriors and Deadpools Mercs for Money, and quickly becoming a super skilled fighter capable of, say, knocking out an Assassins teeth and hitting them through the eyes of several other people on the area in one swing. He's also, surprisingly, smarter then he looks, capable of rebuilding a damaged portal machine with Darknet Tech after barely paying attention to the Genius who built it before.

•Mind Control/Reality Warping Resistance - This one's weird. Slapstick resisted the Psycho-Radioatomic Mediocritizier, a S.S made machine that let the Overlord control reality. It did this by leaning into the whole "believe enough, and its real" Schtick, but with Ecchs inhabitants beliefs. The machine replaced theirs with the overlord, but Slapsticks mind was able to resist that notion (what Overlord wanted); him to be like everybody else and never rebel. He resisted mind control by just being himself. ???

•4th Wall Awareness - Like his frenemy Deadpool and a lot of other 90s Parodies, Slapstick is aware of the 4th wall. He doesn't really do much, just being aware of him being a comic and aware of things like cancelation, but he is somehow aware of Daredevil being Blind, and then...procedes to make a joke about it and piss him off

            Freakazoid's Powers and Abilities

•Enhanced Stats - Thanks to his cartoon powers, Freakazoid is strong and super quick, often even traveling as a bolt of Lighting/Electricity. This extends to his durability, which let's him survive massive explosions and basically anything thrown at him so far, albeit without proof for a healing factor.

•Enhanced Senses - Somehow heard a monk raking...in Tibet. How?

•Telekinesis - If he concentrates, Freakazoid can move objects with his mind, but unless he's angry, it takes more concentration that you should be giving in a one on one fight.

•Theoretical Teleportation - In most slapstick (wink) cartoons, the characters can appear behind people or in random places whenever they want, and Freakazoid can do this too. 

•Shape-shifting/Body Control - Freakazoid doesn't really do Cartoon feats on the same level as guys like Bugs Bunny, but he has shown toonforce powers of great potential, like sucking the air out of his body, blowing it up like a balloon, or blowing people away with a mere burp.

•4th Wall Awareness - (Sigh) This is about to get crazy. Just like other Spielberg shows, Freakazoid gets off on breaking the 4th wall as MUCH as possible. He has narrated his own show, got the Animaniacs to sing a variation of his theme song and had both Wakko and The Brain come to his show, as well as going to see Steven himself. Other exploits include knowing things that happened in the cartoon that he wasn't there for, talking to the audience, being aware he's in a cartoon and when a commercial break is, literally walking off set mid shoot, referencing the animators and cameramen...etc. Oh, and multiple other characters in the show have broken the 4th wall like him.

               Slapstick's Tools and Weapons

- Slapstick's infinite pockets have granted him some pretty insane weaponry. These include but are not limited to...

•Gerdie - His Old Reliable, a oversized I'm not compensating for anything sized Mallet he swings with Harley Quinn level strength and precision, even being able to infuse it with that energy I talked about earlier. 

•Super Soaker - just that, but with the same concept as Gerdie and with the same energy powers

•Chained Spiked Ball

•Trombone 

•Bowling Balls/Pins

•Rubber Chicken

•Sponge Puppet (Wonder who that's referencing)

•Shield

•Spartan Helmet

•Dynamite/Tnt with Detonater

•Battle Ax

•Chainsaw

• Wooden Mallet

•Spear

•Boxing Glove Gun (Don't question it)

•Sledgehammer

•Twin Normal hammers

•Giant Gun (3, grew multiple arms, a gun like that in each one because yes)

•Balloon Sword (Used it to battle Taskmaster, because also yes)

•Buzzsaw

•Flamethrower

•Jackhammer

•Dynamite sticks

•Firehouse

•Pies (Because all Cartoons need to throw pies for some reason)

•Spare Limbs (He whipped some up in case he somehow loses one for good to reattach and and replace it)

•Grenades

•Lasso

•Boxing Gloves

•Bro-Mans Sword - Taken from a blatant He-Man rip off he beat up, this sword can slice through pretty much anything, even dimensions and other cartoon Ecch individuals like Slapstick and through Dimensions to take him from Ecch to Earth 616/Our Planet, as well as being able to channel and shoot lightning

•Quasimodos Arm Cannon - Swiped from Saud evil Genius, it is a Laser Cannon that Quasimodo set to a frequency capable of reducing Electroplasm to Goo by exploiting a specific Frequency

             Freakazoids Tools and Weapons

•Wooden Mallet

•Timed Dynamite

•Full Body Suit of Himself (Wore over himself for some reason once)

•Jetpack

•Tape Recorder

•Gas Mask

•Flashlight

•Buzzsaw

•Giant Magnet

•Giant Slingsgot

•Sack

•Freakalair (Basically his batcave)

•Freakmobile - His Batmobile, Aston Martin, and overall pride and joy. It comes equipped with Rocket Boosters for enhance speed or even flight, and multiple Weapons, like a Boot Kicking Attatchment, Glove Extension that can reach to China from a desert in seconds, or TEAR THE SHOW OFF TO CUT TO A COMMERCIAL, an extended TV, and that Giant Magnet and Slingshot.

                                   Feats 

                                Slapstick

- Successfully ripped off Deadpool and stole his Merc online profile

- Saved Dimension Ecch and cured its inhabitants of their cartoon curse

- Resisted the Psycho-Radioatomic Mediocritizier 

Narrowly edged out Carnage as the best new comic character of 1992 (Admittedly I couldn't find where they got this)

- Defeated Overlord, Overkiller, Teddy, Doctor Denton, Neutron Bum, Gauntlet, Bro-Man, Quasimodo, Taskmaster, and Possibly Rhino

                                Strength

- Launched the Large Jack In The Box looking Overlord out of sight with ease

- Shattered the Dimension Ecch Portal Mirror

- Beat up Teddy (Large Robot), easily smashing each other through walls without issue

- Killed a T-Rex

- Fought Elloe Kaifi (Member of World War Hulks Warbound)

-Beat the everloving piss out of Gauntlet (a 20 Tonner according to Marvel)

- Compared/Put in the same League as Rage, Gauntlet, and Ultragirl

        -Rage = 100+ Tonner

        -Ultragirl = Beat up a Sentinel

        -Gauntlet = Also wields a Gauntlet that can           block the Tactigon, a weapon capable of               overpowering and defeating War Machine

- One-shot Death Shield

- Kicked a Head past a Mountain in the distance with ease

- Massacred an army of Robot Thors

- Beat the crap out of Deadpool on multiple occasions, hitting him so hard he vomits with one hit once.

         - Deadpool can tank an explosion that                     was capable of destroying the Hoover                   Dam = 1.778 Kilotons of Tnt

https://imgur.com/a/rjlDYsf

         - Deadpool also scales to Captain America               and Wolverine.

           Steve can tank a nuclear explosion = 104.             tons to 12 Kilotons Of TNT   

 https://vsbattles.fandom.com/wiki/User_blog:Amelia_Lonelyheart/Marvel:_Captain_America_Tanks_Something

          - Logan, along with the other X Men,                         Tanked all of Manhattan being shaken.                 =2 Kilotons

 https://vsbattles.fandom.com/wiki/User_blog:AbeLincoln1865/The_X-Men_Tank_Manhattan_Being_Shaken

                                    Speed

- Dodged Machine Gun Fire

- Ran fast enough to light the ground underneath him on fire (Mach 4.855)

- Could weave around and doge hits from Taskmaster, a regular enemy of Deadpool

- Also jumped Deadpool in those two occasions I mentioned earlier, proving he is at least comparable to Wade

   -Wade has dodged lighting and Cyclops                    Lightspeed Lasers, and scales to Cap                      and Wolverine, who have similar                            scaling and feats of lightspeed                                  reactions

(Proof the lasers are Lightspeed 

https://imgur.io/a/pBkJli8

https://imgur.io/a/Rix2w01

https://imgur.io/a/tG8CU2x

- Used his busted arm to block Quasimodos Arm Cannon, like a boss

                                 Durability 

•Due to Electroplasms nature, you cant really kill him by conventional means anyway, but....

- Not Damaged much by a massive explosion from the Neutron Bum = 9.918-53.065 tons of TNT (I don't have the link sadly, as I got it in the old call chat on The DB Discord, which was reset recently, leaving it in the dust)

- Except for having his weakness exploited, could shrug off hits from KIA, the guy weilding that Tactigon weapon that Defeated War Machine

- Survived being smashed by Ragnorak, an evil robot clone of Thor

- Tanked being flattend by The Thing and being thrown across the City

                              Freakazoid

Crossed over to Animaniacs, Pinky and The Brain, and Teen Titans Go!

Saved both the President and Pearl Harbor in one day (It was Time Travel, don't ask)

Successfully came back into the spotlight in Go! After multiple decades off the air

Helped Dexter, his other half who sounds like Danny Phantom, get a date (WAY more impressive if you really watch the show)

Defeated Cave Guy, Candle Jack, Longhorn, Gutierrez as a human or Freakazoid version, and The Lobe

                                Strength

- Effortlessly kicked two men several buildings away

- Opened a giant Snakes Jaws (An Anaconda's bite force = 600 P.S.I, and this snake is several times larger)

- Can Rip a Metal Door off its hinges

- With 8 other people, pulled a plane out of the water and onto an island (A Plane like that can weigh up to 87.5 tons, so, a fair share would be 9.72 tons. Still, regular people like his girlfriend Steff and Cop Buddy Cosgrove were trying to help, so it could be more)

- Ragdolled that Giant Snake from earlier

- Easily yanked Gutierrez's Eyepatch so hard the recoil from it snapping sent him back through his building, then through 3 others before bouncing straight back the way he came from a Telephone pole wire (I don't even know)

- Most Likely scales above his archenemy, The Lobe, in a physical sense. The Lobe could tank a large Chemical Plant exploding in his face.

                                  Speed

- Often travels as Electricity/Lightning

- Moves fast enough to leave fire in his tracks and even blur on occasion

- Has dodged Gunfire

- Remember that Monk raking in Tibet? Freakazoid ran over there to yell at him, then back to Washington D.C, both in seconds, and later, ran there even faster, in about 2.16 seconds as the fastest time (Mach 16,560.13098)

                              Durability 

-Likely comparable to the Lobe, who Tanked a Chemical Plant exploding in his face

-Survived a Massive Nuke point blank in Foamy The Freakadog

-Also tanked another Nuclear Bomb, this one actually said to be 800 Megatons as a destructive yield

                             Weaknesses

Slapstick may be a skilled Assassin, but he's kind of an idiot in most fields of science or any thing that requires brain power outside of a fight. There's also the big one: He canonically has no Penis, and therefore, is still a Virgin, and will likely stay that way, as the device that let him turn from Human to Cartoon got scrambled after he stayed as Slapstick too long, and now he's stuck as him, which has led to him having serious bouts of depression due to the improv comedy prompt that is his life. In the actual Combat sense, his powers are apparently magic based, and can be weakened via Magic Dampeners. The big one though is that Electroplasm is controlled by electricity, just like how he gets amped by merely touching it, a countercharge at the correct frequency will reduce his body to Goo, effectively killing him. Still, piss him off about his genitals or lack there of, and he becomes almost unstoppable. Despite his laughable past and look, Steven built himself into a successful mercenary and formidable foe, and even managed to save Dimension Ecch upon returning years later. He also got a girlfriend (She even knows he doesn't have Junk, so a pretty good one all things considered), so if you cross Steve Harmon, then Slapstick is the best way to describe your soon to be splattered remains.

Freakazoid is plenty powerful, but not invincible. His series only went 2 seasons, he's arguably the least famous of Spielberg's cartoons, and he doesn't have much chance of making that movie deal in the theme song. In a fight, him being created by a computer chip sort of carry over to his flaws. He is powered by an energy field from that chip, though you only need him to access the field, and if it is messed with, he becomes way weaker. If his Al is zapped with electricity, it will short out his circuits, preventing him from using his powers (even though a tablespoon of Salt in a glass of water will fix him). Stress also causes him to mentally withdraw and get incredibly dumb. His main flaws is that he is weak to Negative Ions charged Graphite Bars, and if they are used against him he can't use his powers and is basically helpless. Also, he, no joke, TOLD Gutierrez that to his face because he's kind of an idiot most of the time. However, none of that keeps Freakazoid down for long. He's a powerful hero who got a girlfriend that loves both the Freak and the Geek inside him, a city that loves him, and a fanbase that patiently waits for him to grace the cartoon landscape once again. He's here to save the nation so stay tuned to the station (if not...nothing really, I'll still be employed)....FREAKAZOID!!!

                                Slapstick                                                                      Advantages

+Most Likely holds the Strength advantage          

+Much faster in Reaction terms

+Far More versatile in powers and weapons 

+More skilled and experienced as a fighter    

+Can potentially figure out Freakazoid's weaknesses, or just outright exploit it without knowing them to cover the massive durability gap

+Electroplasm's nature leaves him virtually unkillable to Freakazoid's standard powers...

+Got a Girlfriend with no...Y'Know

+Still Somewhat relevant thanks to CBR/ScreenRant articles and Marvel Future Fight

                          Disadvantages 

-Can't kill Freakazoid w/o exploiting said weaknesses thanks to the massive gap between his strength and Freaks Durability (about 66,666.67 x difference)

-slower in movement speed

-...about Debatably far less intelligent thanks to Freakazoid having the knowledge of the entire internet 

-Freakazoids internet knowledge could let him figure out and exploit his weaknesses

-Still has no Junk 

-Probably never gonna get a show or movie because Marvel only cares about popular characters, not good characters

                             Freakazoid                                                                     Advantages

+ Far too tough for Slapstick to kill with pure force

+Much faster in pure movement speed

+Due to having the knowledge of the internet, could debatably know all of Slapstick's Powers and Abilities

+If he figured the weaknesses out, it's POSSIBle he ccould exploit them

+Partially voiced by Danny Phantom

                          Disadvantages 

- Not on the same level as Strength 

-While physically faster, Slapstick is still quick enough in reactions to see him coming and counter amy of his attacks

-While the Internet thing technically makes hum smarter, he is shown to be COMICALLY stupid far more times then Slapstick, and still doesn't have the same kind of Skill/Experience Harmon brings to the table

-Not nearly as versatile, and doesn't have many options for exploiting Slapstick's weaknesses

-Probably Spielbergs most forgettable cartoon -

-His show is kinda mid to be honest

                                Verdict  

So, my first blog has a, fittingly, rather difficult verdict here, with both Slapstick and Freakazoid having plenty of advantages in this battle. Slapstick is more then likely stronger, having gone up against people with durability feats beyond any of Freakazoids showings of strength, like Deadpool, which compares him to multiple Kiloton feats from the likes of Wolverine and Captain America. That scaling also grants him Lightspeed reactions thanks to knocking around Deadpool and Taskmaster, both of whom have shown those kinds of speeds before. That's roughly 53 x Faster then Freakazoids shown speed, and more then quick enough to dodge any attack thrown his way, then capitalize with his shown superior skill, given his more fleshed out history as a fighter and Assassin. His Toon powers are also far more versatile, and the sheer amount of weapons he has are far superior to Freaks arsenal, which including things like Bro-Mans Sword, which could technically negate the durability difference if we take it "being able to slice through anything" as literal. Speaking of durability, Slapsticks is unquestionably superior. While he hasn't shown the 800 megaton level of survivability Freak has, he has shrugged off hits from people way beyond that, like The Thing and Ragnorak. His regenerative capabilities are also way better then Freakzoids, and overall, Electroplasms quirks make it so Freakazoid has very little options of finishing him off. Freakazoid isn't outmatched though. He tends to show crazier feats of raw power without Slapsticks scaling, and is physically much faster. His having the knowledge of the ENTIRE INTERNET also means he is more likely to figure out Slapstick's weaknesses, and try to exploit them quicker. That would also likely give him knowledge of Steve's powers if we're being realistic. The big one is that he is FAR too tough for Slapstick to kill with brute force. Tanking that 800 Megaton warhead is over 60,000 x stronger then any kiloton scaling you grant Slapstick, leaving both of them virtually unkillable to each other by most measures. This leaves it down to their weaknesses, who can exploit then, and who is more likely to figure them out in the first place. For Freakazoid, his internet knowledge is incredibly useful here, as he can potentially gain knowledge to all of Slapstick's Powers and weaknesses, as well as how to exploit then accordingly. However, there are a few problems with this. Firstly, taking the entire internet now is a bit capricious, as Freakazoid has been off the air for decades, and was only active during the late 1990s. He even shows no current knowledge of events when he shows up in the TTG show, so granting him future knowledge of how to exploit Slapsticks powers is kind of unfair. Secondly, unless he is granted that knowledge from the future, his powers are kind of meaningless here. He would be granted outdated information on Slapstick's weapons and strength, given his most impressive feats have happened after Freakazoid! Ended, and outdated info on his powers, as Electroplasms weaknesses and, say, him turning back to Steve Harmon, have been changed and altered long since. Third, he's a bit of an idiot most of the time, and hasn't really shown he can use that knowledge at all, so just assuming he already knows this and can figure out how to exploit a very specific countercharge frequency, especially when considering he doesn't really have any tool or power that can exploit it. So, it's possible he could figure it out, but he's out of luck in actually capitalizing on it. Let's compare that to Slapstick. He may suffer from the same kind of idiocy Freak does from time to time, but he's not like that in a straight up fight. His Assassin skill and overall quick wittedness in combat or things that interest him is shown to surpass Freakazoid's consistently, so giving him the intelligence edge here is, surprisingly, more likely. Still, it's pretty far fetched he'd figure out Freakazoid's Powers on his own, but the interesting thing is...he doesn't really need to. First, there's always the possibility that Freakazoid will simply tell him, leaving it to Slapstick to exploit the weaknesses, but one of his big ones is easily exploitable by Slapstick without him having to do much. Remember how Freakazoid has an Energy Field that powers him, and, if it is screwed with, his powers get weaker and he becomes at risk? Well, it's just that. Energy. Something Slapstick naturally reacts to upon contact, and foreign electricity actually makes him stronger. Now, it's possible that its not actually electricity, but its pretty dang likely considering he often moves AS a bolt of Lightning/Electricity. Once Slapstick gets hit enough, it's extremely likely he'd figure that out and capitalize on it, and even if he didn't figure I out that way, Freakaziud moving as Electricity and touching him at all will clue him in on that fact. With that ability to absorb Freaks power supply, Slapstick can whittle him down as his strength and powers go on the fritz, either turning him back to Dexter or just getting weak enough for a Slapstick, who gets more powerful with the more energy he takes, to finish him off for good. Plus, given his speed advantage, it's more then likely Freakazoid couldn't avoid any power absorption or deadly blows when it really matters. Even if both had knowledge and the ability to counter each others weaknesses, Slapsticks higher skill and reactions would still ensure he would be able take advantage first. Ultimately, while Freakazoid can beat Slapstick in several categories, he just doesn't have an answer to Slapstick's superior abilities and overall experience as a superhero in comparison. So, with all said and done, The Winner...is Slapstick!